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How The Dishwasher Crushed Connection

Those of you reading this are probably seasoned enough to remember, your mom, or your grandma hanging clothes on the line to dry. The bag or basket of clothespins at her waist or hung over her shoulder, she moving side by side down the line of clothes. The rusty metal rods strung with clothesline swaying in the sun, with sheets or shirts bouncing in the breeze. While there is not much sweeter to our limbic system than the fragrance of sun dried laundry, warm and fresh in the laundry basket there is also that long lost art of reflection while…

Be Gentle With Your Partner

I am noticing in my conversations with couples that one of the two of them will tell me in confidence, “He’s losing his hearing but won’t get it tested” or “She’s starting to mumble all the time”. Or “I have stopped asking him to open jars, he can’t do it either!” Other topics: time to stop climbing ladder driving is becoming dangerous/risky little things are getting forgotten using power tools is more difficult the laundry basket suddenly feels really heavy The heavy wet laundry is awkward to move from washer to dryer getting the skillet from the bottom shelf is…

When It’s Too Late To Let Go

One of the most common conundrums I see with people in the third stage, is this: It’s clear they are slowing down but reluctant to let go of the idea they will live vigorously forever! Currently at mid 70s many of you are still climbing ladders, wielding chainsaws, lifting heavy pots and pans, bending over the oven, trimming the wisteria. Playing with grandkids wears you out but is still an adventure of running, getting down on all fours, playing tag. But can that last forever? One look at your parents, if they are alive into their 90s says “No, it…

Myths About Aging

So in 2022 I am coming clean about where I gather these insights. I help people move from one home to another. I help them shed memories of all colors, purge unnecessary burdens, mental or physical, overcome fears about making big decisions, let go of perceived negative outcomes; basically re orient them into a new home, a new chapter, a fresh start. This is work that is deeply personal as you step in and mess with people’s nest! But this has been an amazing opportunity to talk and share about this whole aging business and just how complex it is.…

Spirit vs The Body

Aging has never been easy! Let’s recap: Your joints get loose and achy. (gravity and hormones). Your vision is not what it used to be, cue the squint! Food is not as vibrant tasting. Likely your ankles are resisting a fast pivot. Your teeth and gums may be acting up. Skin: too many issues to name. That’s the hard physical truth! Then there is the social/emotional side: Putting on makeup (if you do) is not as much fun as on a 20 year old face. You can’t scamper up a ladder as casually as you remember doing so many times.…

In it together

We finally find ourselves with something in common.  Rich or poor, red or blue, Christian or Muslim, boy, girl or non binary, we are finally, indisputably,  once again ALL  part of the human race. A totality. I used to think it would take a visit from Martians for us to put down our petty squabbles and appreciate this magnificently beautiful planet we live on and to celebrate the one in 20M-100M  shot of even getting to take the ride called LIFE. To savor simple pleasures, to marvel at the miraculous abundance  of a single seed, to appreciate our atmosphere, the thin, blue barrier between us and outer…

The Lighter Side of Hair

It’s funny about hair. We all admire a beautiful head of lush hair on a head. But put just one hair in your soup and watch people recoil. How can one hair be horrible and thousands be attractive? Ladies, we spend lots of time and money in our youth getting a bikini wax, only to watch, as we age, our south of the border hair goes gray and scraggly.  Or your eyebrows are disappearing and they need tint or colored wax to frame your face. It makes a huge difference! Men need to have a companion alert them to hairy…

Harvest of a Lifetime

It’s harvest time.  The light is golden, the cycle of the earth is coming to another close.  The Harvest Moon of September has come and gone.  There is a lovely peace in the fall, anticipation of the renewing aspect of winter. Things slow down, you turn inward to contemplate the lessons of the year, of your life, and how to apply them to 2020. We live currently with a backdrop of uncertainty and many feel these are the darkest of times, but I disagree.  Any student of history knows that we are suffering more from anticipating disasters,  than from real…

Broken Bones

As a Realtor I can’t tell you how many women come to my open houses and tell me they know they need to downsize but “My husband is not ready”.  You many want to consider ~ He will never be ready. Accepting your golden years is a shock.  You still feel pretty good and because it’s so incremental you really have forgotten how much stronger, energetic and durable you were 10 or 20 years ago.  It seems reasonable that you can keep going. And since your bones don’t report in on their  declining density, or your joints don’t announce a…

How do you know when it’s time?

It is clear to me in talking to hundreds of folks over 60-70, myself included, that they don’t feel old. They don’t feel much different than they did around 35.  If they are in reasonable health,  they still feel as though they should be able to move the couch across the room, tear up a flower bed, repaint the shed, left that planter, trim the hedge on a ladder.  You know, all the stuff you have done all your life. Haven’t they always done those with ease?  But there comes a time when a deep, calm voice inside says, “Defer…